Friday, March 7, 2008

A Three Act Play (or, Why I Should Go to Bed by Midnight)

-Prelude-

Nazza says: how would you like us to be more exciting?
Nazza says: *dances wildly!*
Nazza says: maybe you would like us to perform a 3-act play

Act 1: Wherein He Was Born

Prosthesis: Lo! For I am here.
Bosfoppo: I am here also.
Prosthesis: We are russian.

Act ZWEI: Untitled (aka This is the Title of Act 2)

Vladimir: Let's slaughter the peeps.
Henchman: Why did my mother call me henchman?

Act III: Boy is This Play Short

Little Chris: *dies*
The Fuzz: Oh no! We have killed our prince.
Johnbob: He was fat anyway.

Exuent

3 comments:

Hosford said...

Act IV: Fuck me a talking donkey.

Karlheinz: Ve will slaugther all dem juus.
Jehosephat: I am a jew! But it's ok because I shall be saved by...

ANALRETENTIVEBOY!!

Redsam: Behold, tis I the man of red, anal stimulation, arbitrary obsessions and sexual interest in my own mother.

*whips out wang and stabs Karheinz

Regina: You are our hero, nay, our saviour.
Paris Hilton: I thought horses went nay?
Altogether: Fuck me a talking donkey.

Chia L'Étranger said...

I refuse to be killed out of this play.

ACT V: Resurrection (Of Chris)

(Chuck Norris descends from heavens)

Chuck Norris: I hereby declare Little Chris to be alive again!

Little Chris: Awesome! Thanks Chuck Norris!

Chuck Norris:(roundhouse kicks the general public)
(re-ascends to the heavens)

Exeunt omnes

Jenny said...

Act VI: Death Strikes Back (and kills Little Chris again).

(Christopher Reeve descends from heavens)

Christopher Reeve: I am the most awesome Chris in existance. Just because I'm dead and for the last few years of my life I was a vegetable doesn't mean a thing. I hereby declare The Most Awesome Chris in Existance (me) to be alive again like I was in my prime (not a vegetable). And all other Lesser (Littler) Chris's to be not alive.

(Little Chris dies...again)

Christopher Reeve: WOOT!! I SHALL NOW TAKE OVER THE WORLD!! AND TO DO THAT I MUST BECOME THE HOT EVIL SUPERMAN WHO WAS SO MUCH BETTER THAN CLARK KENT!! AND HOTTER!!

Christopher Reeve, now EVIL HOT SUPERMAN: I shall now kill Clark Kent. Who looks a lot like Little Chris. I'M THE ONLY CHRIS IN THE WORLD!! SCREW YOU CLARK!!

(EVIL HOT SUPERMAN (previously Christopher Reeve) kills Clark Kent (who looks uncannily like Little Chris)and THE EVIL HOT SUPERMAN formally known as Prince Dork. TAKES OVER THE WORLD WITH A BICYCLE PUMP!!!)

The End...FOREVER!!!

(seriously...its already twice as long as this THREE act play was going to be. STOP ADDING THINGS YOU STUPID PEOPLE!!!)