"That's a horrible nickname! That's worse than vomitface!"

"Sam's face and head only allows for a certain level of cool"

My sister Allie thought that the Blues Brothers actors were actually brothers.

"I never got that the logo for limewire was a lime" - the other sister

hosford: if al gore had a cake
hosford: not an entirely unfeasible possibility
hosford: he then ate the icing off the cake
hosford: he would go
hosford: 'OHZ SHIT THEY AINT NO CAKE NOW'

When that guy accidentally sung a Nazi song in Germany at his concert, the headline was "Nazi Furore". Awful pun. I shook my head in dismay.

I forget whether this was in the actual article or just a comment, but either way it was awesome. "The woman who had everything is dead because she wanted a slightly firmer ass"

She died because of butt-surgery!

"the guy sitting next to me on the plane thought I was insane coz I kept laughing when we experienced turbulence" - the other sister, back from Melbourne

Mum got offended when my sister said a line from The Office involving sluts. "Mum, it was a quote." "Well...I'll quote you!" Ten seconds passed. "With my hand!"