I balanced a Coke can on Morgan's head.
Hudson played Marvin Gaye on his laptop. Luckily I had headphones in, so only JimM was subjected to gaye.
Morgan kept calling out for Alec then looking away when Alec engaged in conversation. Alec pronounced intent to murder Morgan several times.
Charlie joined us for far too brief a time.
Jimm queried if anyone had seen a woman who wears only lycra. We concluded she was from the future.
"I'm listening to Television."
"You can do that now, amazing technology."
Morgan took off his soda-stained jumper so I hummed "You Can Leave Your Hat On".
I tried to insult Morgan by way of saying "Claire was the only not crap one on the bus. NOT INCLUDING YOU!" but I got it wrong so I accidentally gave him a compliment.
Exposure says:
whoa Bruford's top ten book list has Levitin
REAL MEN HAVE CURVES says:
I have no idea who either of those people are
Tuesday, May 26, 2009
Monday, May 25, 2009
"holy crap mum's microwaving her coffee wtf"
There was an ad on TV for "Invisilifts", which are some form of bust enhancing product. They had a sale, where usually they'd send 10 for some price, but this time they'd give you 20 for the same. "Why would you need more than 2?"
Last Wednesday I watched Bruce Springsteen, Steve Earle and Chuck Berry on a big projector. In class. That class was awesome. That was also the class where I mentioned Peter Hammill and Trent Reznor.
Apparently Levi played NIN's "Closer" at a party one time. For some reason I cannot comprehend, this did not go down well.
This one guy on TV said the most disturbing aspect of the Young Liberals scandal non-event was "An otherwise perfectly fine young 19-year-old woman reading Ayn Rand." What a fountainhead, if you know what I mean. Ayn Rand arose from the dead and murdered him. Then the world was overtaken by Randroids. It looked kinda like that movie Metropolis. I'm glad whoever made that movie never made a Metropolis pt 2. If he did it would've been horrible, and no one likes Jordan Rudess anyway.
The best response was some woman saying "People choose their political organisation on the basis of facts, not figures."
"Johnny Cash looks like my grandpa"
...
"Maybe he is"
I also found a new aphorism. "The defining quality of a hit single is that you hate it."
Brett Kimmorley got injured the game after he witnessed me. I'm bad luck for footballers! It's a shame I don't come across Knights players more often.
"Trust pop music to be able to ruin a collection of words forever"
Last Wednesday I watched Bruce Springsteen, Steve Earle and Chuck Berry on a big projector. In class. That class was awesome. That was also the class where I mentioned Peter Hammill and Trent Reznor.
Apparently Levi played NIN's "Closer" at a party one time. For some reason I cannot comprehend, this did not go down well.
This one guy on TV said the most disturbing aspect of the Young Liberals scandal non-event was "An otherwise perfectly fine young 19-year-old woman reading Ayn Rand." What a fountainhead, if you know what I mean. Ayn Rand arose from the dead and murdered him. Then the world was overtaken by Randroids. It looked kinda like that movie Metropolis. I'm glad whoever made that movie never made a Metropolis pt 2. If he did it would've been horrible, and no one likes Jordan Rudess anyway.
The best response was some woman saying "People choose their political organisation on the basis of facts, not figures."
"Johnny Cash looks like my grandpa"
...
"Maybe he is"
I also found a new aphorism. "The defining quality of a hit single is that you hate it."
Brett Kimmorley got injured the game after he witnessed me. I'm bad luck for footballers! It's a shame I don't come across Knights players more often.
"Trust pop music to be able to ruin a collection of words forever"
Wednesday, May 20, 2009
"TALES FROM TOPOGRAPHIC OCEANS!" - Guy Pratt
"Don't look at my face" - Shaun Micallef
I saw Brett Kimmorley at Kotara. I did a double-take. I stared at his face too long, so he probably hates me. I'm taller than he is.
"Why are so many interviews on American TV so short?"
"cuz we got shit to do"
I also saw Mike Huckabee playing bass. It was disturbingly hilarious.
"I didn't know Peter Costello could write words"
"I was startled by a paparazzo who I quite understandably mistook for a zombie." - Woody Harrelson
I saw Brett Kimmorley at Kotara. I did a double-take. I stared at his face too long, so he probably hates me. I'm taller than he is.
"Why are so many interviews on American TV so short?"
"cuz we got shit to do"
I also saw Mike Huckabee playing bass. It was disturbingly hilarious.
"I didn't know Peter Costello could write words"
"I was startled by a paparazzo who I quite understandably mistook for a zombie." - Woody Harrelson
Saturday, May 16, 2009
"Grow some consonants you Samoan"
Part 2 of the epic four man conversation (we were joined by Jared, Morgan and Hudsoft):
"Some guy called me metrosexual on a forum because I gave him advice on where to get his hair cut...he asked goddammit!"
"Maybe he just saw what you look like"
We were discussing what this week's trivia joke would be. The most popular topics are racist ones and misogynistic ones. "Just write 'I beat women up' and see if he reads it out." (He didn't read out any trivia jokes this week.)
Scot reckoned Hosford should just mention his honest views and they'd get read out.
"Do you want me to make you a CD Scott?"
"Yes. I want you to make it out of clay."
There was a photo of David Gallop in front of a series of NRL logos. It looked like a magic eye puzzle (the hidden picture was David Gallop).
"Can anyone get me some lightbulbs which look like vacuum valves?"
"I can get you a vacuum valve that looks like a lightbulb"
"2002 was a good year, a good year...actaully 2002 was a shit year, I spent the entire time arguing with an indian. I broke his veins apparently." - Hosford on the guy in the 7/11
Morgan did some things not appropriate in the public arena.
"I did nothing to him...apart from hit his head into a pole" - Hosford on the guy
He likes his women like he likes his family. I'm not going to dignify the joke with a relaying of the punchline. Whoa two Yes references, in just one sentence.
"The guys that lived up the street from me in 1996 used to play Hanson from their stereo on their front porch...my brother threw a sandwich at them once" - Morgan
"Some guy called me metrosexual on a forum because I gave him advice on where to get his hair cut...he asked goddammit!"
"Maybe he just saw what you look like"
We were discussing what this week's trivia joke would be. The most popular topics are racist ones and misogynistic ones. "Just write 'I beat women up' and see if he reads it out." (He didn't read out any trivia jokes this week.)
Scot reckoned Hosford should just mention his honest views and they'd get read out.
"Do you want me to make you a CD Scott?"
"Yes. I want you to make it out of clay."
There was a photo of David Gallop in front of a series of NRL logos. It looked like a magic eye puzzle (the hidden picture was David Gallop).
"Can anyone get me some lightbulbs which look like vacuum valves?"
"I can get you a vacuum valve that looks like a lightbulb"
"2002 was a good year, a good year...actaully 2002 was a shit year, I spent the entire time arguing with an indian. I broke his veins apparently." - Hosford on the guy in the 7/11
Morgan did some things not appropriate in the public arena.
"I did nothing to him...apart from hit his head into a pole" - Hosford on the guy
He likes his women like he likes his family. I'm not going to dignify the joke with a relaying of the punchline. Whoa two Yes references, in just one sentence.
"The guys that lived up the street from me in 1996 used to play Hanson from their stereo on their front porch...my brother threw a sandwich at them once" - Morgan
"They may as well put a tag on it, 'Coke: hostile to life itself' " - Tim
Last week Levi mentioned this guy who walked past, who we knew as Indian Tony Levin. Hos and I both shouted "Indian Tony Levin!" simultaneously.
On Wednesday I recorded a conversation involving myself, Hosford, Tim and Scott on my iriver. It was great. I said "What a jerk" like six times.
I was worried I'd get crap on my iriver because of Hosford's being a General Slob. He replied "Which one of us has a protective cover for their iriver and which one of us is exposing theirs to the elements" while pointing out his has a protective cover. Tim laughed egregariously.
"Also, I parked behind engineering today...accidentally took the long way around...and got my pants wet" - Tim
"We'll be able to eat lollies without cutting Levi's stomach open" - Scott
"It's a hippoportomobile!" - Tim
"I have brown stuff on my pants" - Tim
"He has no emotion, he is a robot" was my assessment of Sam. Tim concluded he has no soul.
*on leaving* "I will return"
"You will return in A View to a Kill"
Hosford dramatically read out a uni magazine article about women and nice guys in a barrage of accents. "Guys so far I've learnt nothing and have not come even close to solving the shoe thing - what the fuck is the shoe thing?"
"I solved it in five seconds."
Scott suggested three times Hosford should read Ask Maude from the uni magazine. "I don't have it" he said with the magazine in front of him. Then he burst into flames. The uni magazines were multiplying.
"Scott what are you doing, get your tongue out of my iriver"
I air-bassed. To my own bass playing. It was awesome.
I saw Rain Man recently. Here's my review:
"You know what would've been great is if when Dustin Hoffman was being a jerk Tom Cruise went 'why would you do that, you're a jerk' "
Valkyrie should've been Tom Cruise walking up to Hitler and saying "you're a jerk".
"Damn Scott, you are so incompetent at reading comics"
"Your mum's a comic"
We chastised Tim for not having a Z Swoop system in place.
"Find your own zeuhl song to quote"
On Wednesday I recorded a conversation involving myself, Hosford, Tim and Scott on my iriver. It was great. I said "What a jerk" like six times.
I was worried I'd get crap on my iriver because of Hosford's being a General Slob. He replied "Which one of us has a protective cover for their iriver and which one of us is exposing theirs to the elements" while pointing out his has a protective cover. Tim laughed egregariously.
"Also, I parked behind engineering today...accidentally took the long way around...and got my pants wet" - Tim
"We'll be able to eat lollies without cutting Levi's stomach open" - Scott
"It's a hippoportomobile!" - Tim
"I have brown stuff on my pants" - Tim
"He has no emotion, he is a robot" was my assessment of Sam. Tim concluded he has no soul.
*on leaving* "I will return"
"You will return in A View to a Kill"
Hosford dramatically read out a uni magazine article about women and nice guys in a barrage of accents. "Guys so far I've learnt nothing and have not come even close to solving the shoe thing - what the fuck is the shoe thing?"
"I solved it in five seconds."
Scott suggested three times Hosford should read Ask Maude from the uni magazine. "I don't have it" he said with the magazine in front of him. Then he burst into flames. The uni magazines were multiplying.
"Scott what are you doing, get your tongue out of my iriver"
I air-bassed. To my own bass playing. It was awesome.
I saw Rain Man recently. Here's my review:
"You know what would've been great is if when Dustin Hoffman was being a jerk Tom Cruise went 'why would you do that, you're a jerk' "
Valkyrie should've been Tom Cruise walking up to Hitler and saying "you're a jerk".
"Damn Scott, you are so incompetent at reading comics"
"Your mum's a comic"
We chastised Tim for not having a Z Swoop system in place.
"Find your own zeuhl song to quote"
Saturday, May 9, 2009
"Levi is not famous for Levi's"
It's getting worse. I saw a Bunnings ad in the newspaper and I still laughed at it.
"You gotta question the insight of a company that names itself after nature's failure" - on Dodo Internet
There was an article on cyberbullying in the paper, one of the quoted insults was "she has a weird laugh and a face like a koala".
Scott and I won trivia (we both went "true" instead of everyone else's "false" on one question), but we had a pact that only one of us would go up to get the prize. So I went up, and for my troubles I got an electric shock! What a jerk.
Even though I won fair and square he dismissed me because people shouted "LAPTOP". So, I left a death threat and next time trivia's on I'm bringing a big nife. He is not an accurate adjudicator at all! I'd go so far as to say he's a very inaccurate adjudicator.
Oh and Jimmh called me a burnt CD. The indignity! What a horrible day. On the upside, I saw a possum and Theo and Hudson filled in all the questions they didn't know the answer to with "Joe's sister". Joe got riled by this.
I made a bunch of bad jokes to Levi, but he laughed at them so they became good jokes.
"Banana Lounge" - Bunnings ad
We were watching some "Movies in 5 Seconds" on a website and the "GoodFellas" one was a montage of Joe Pesci swearing. Jimmh cried out "WHOA IT'S JOE!" and I was all like "yeah, didn't you know he was in this movie" until I looked up and saw Joe had arrived. Then I went "WHOA IT'S JOE!"
(on tribute bands)
"Why pay to see a third rate Sting?"
"Yeah, I'd rather see a first rate Sting, or the real Sting"
Adam Hills sung Screaming Jets by Johnny Warman. I thought I was the only person in this country who had that song. I'm going to form a band with Adam and name our band after a good song, ala Screaming Jets and Jet. Of course, that means our band will suck. "Welcome to the stage, Several Species of Small Furry Animals Gathered Together in a Cave and Grooving with a Pict!"
"Park Bench, $67" - Bunnings ad
At uni I wandered over to one of the "express" terminals to check my emails, and the one I wandered over to had someone already logged in. So I thought "heh some idiot has left their thing logged on" and clicked the Start menu to see who it was. My name greeted me from the Start Menu.
"whoa, the library spoke to me" - Jimmh
"Have you ever considered how amazing that mouth is? We have" - the most disturbing toothpaste commercial
"Oh man, was he recording the whole conversation? The only thing I said since sitting down was 'I love you' " - Theo
"You gotta question the insight of a company that names itself after nature's failure" - on Dodo Internet
There was an article on cyberbullying in the paper, one of the quoted insults was "she has a weird laugh and a face like a koala".
Scott and I won trivia (we both went "true" instead of everyone else's "false" on one question), but we had a pact that only one of us would go up to get the prize. So I went up, and for my troubles I got an electric shock! What a jerk.
Even though I won fair and square he dismissed me because people shouted "LAPTOP". So, I left a death threat and next time trivia's on I'm bringing a big nife. He is not an accurate adjudicator at all! I'd go so far as to say he's a very inaccurate adjudicator.
Oh and Jimmh called me a burnt CD. The indignity! What a horrible day. On the upside, I saw a possum and Theo and Hudson filled in all the questions they didn't know the answer to with "Joe's sister". Joe got riled by this.
I made a bunch of bad jokes to Levi, but he laughed at them so they became good jokes.
"Banana Lounge" - Bunnings ad
We were watching some "Movies in 5 Seconds" on a website and the "GoodFellas" one was a montage of Joe Pesci swearing. Jimmh cried out "WHOA IT'S JOE!" and I was all like "yeah, didn't you know he was in this movie" until I looked up and saw Joe had arrived. Then I went "WHOA IT'S JOE!"
(on tribute bands)
"Why pay to see a third rate Sting?"
"Yeah, I'd rather see a first rate Sting, or the real Sting"
Adam Hills sung Screaming Jets by Johnny Warman. I thought I was the only person in this country who had that song. I'm going to form a band with Adam and name our band after a good song, ala Screaming Jets and Jet. Of course, that means our band will suck. "Welcome to the stage, Several Species of Small Furry Animals Gathered Together in a Cave and Grooving with a Pict!"
"Park Bench, $67" - Bunnings ad
At uni I wandered over to one of the "express" terminals to check my emails, and the one I wandered over to had someone already logged in. So I thought "heh some idiot has left their thing logged on" and clicked the Start menu to see who it was. My name greeted me from the Start Menu.
"whoa, the library spoke to me" - Jimmh
"Have you ever considered how amazing that mouth is? We have" - the most disturbing toothpaste commercial
"Oh man, was he recording the whole conversation? The only thing I said since sitting down was 'I love you' " - Theo
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