Surfer fights off shark

Hosford 1 asked Hosford the Lesser to make him a sandwich.

"Make me a sandwich."

"I'll make you a penis," was the witty retort.

"A small one," Hosford replied absent-mindedly. "Wait -"

II.

I wrote down a quote from that TV show where the cops are New Zealanders and the narrator is also a New Zealander. I really should watch that show more often. Comedy bronze. Anyway, the quote was "Operation Trojan swung into action".

I could've just written that as

"Operation Trojan swung into action" - kiwi narrator

but I didn't. I'm not really sure why.

PSYCHE!

III.

Ellie
thats gross man
Nazza
what is?
Ellie
Clutching at straws, still drowning says: (7:19:40 PM)
you know what i want to see in a film
Clutching at straws, still drowning says: (7:19:43 PM)
someone get beat to death with maraccas
Nazza
lol
well heaps of films are violent nowadays
i just want the violence to cater to my taste
if id said "you know what i want to see in a documentary"
that would be a different matter

"Kevin Costner Debuts Album"

I'm so vain I think the song is about me, and it was written 20 years before I was born.

Here's an excerpt of me being a great brother:

ALLIEgator said:
why do people use similes?
Nazza said:
WHY THE FUCK DO YOU THINK THEY WOULD
TO COMPARE SHIT

I think I went a little overboard.

megan says:
sd
MEGAN UFIHDR
poopy
Ascension in incentive end says:
yes
megan says:
you are poop
shgfpru
aspergers
Ascension in incentive end says:
shgfpru is now allisons name
your last name is now ufihdr
megan says:
Huh?

The perils of leaving one's laptop unattended. i like poop

IV.

Nazza: teenagers are like children with adult bodies
Nazza: that's actually really scary to think about
Ellie: lol
Ellie: yeah
Ellie: s'pecially if ur banging one

How insane is that headline? I couldn't make an insaner headline in four words. "Kevin Costner". "Debuts". "Album". I get headaches thinking about it. It's genius.

"I'm confused
I'm a girl" - RJ out of context